The Secrets To Converting Your Charisma As A Host Into An Asset With Kim Seltzer

Becoming an effective podcaster takes skill and practice, especially if you want your charisma as a host to be an asset. The host of The Charisma Quotient and CEO of Seltzer Style, Kim Seltzer, joins this episode to talk about how she does business and what her perception of podcasting is. Understand the seemingly complex thought process that goes into the creation of a podcast, starting from signing up a guest, to arranging your intro, all the way to formulating your call to action. Also, learn in this conversation how you can monetize your podcast without devaluing it with sponsorship, but still recoup your costs, and then some.

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The Secrets To Converting Your Charisma As A Host Into An Asset With Kim Seltzer

I have a great new podcaster to introduce you to, but this is the one I’m excited about. She and I got to have dinner together at Podfest. I loved her energy. I hadn’t even listened to her show but it made me want to listen to it. I was so excited when I knew she was going to come on the show because that means that I have a good excuse to go listening to shows. As I’ve checked it out, I’ve realized there are some brilliant things going on here that you’re going to absolutely love and some brilliant advice because she’s a little bit unusual. I’ve got Kim Seltzer. Her show is called The Charisma Quotient and she’s a coach. She is using her podcast and she styled it. It’s strategic and it’s got the right value for it but she’s using it to increase their coaching business. That’s exactly what she was talking at Podfest about how do you use a podcast to build a coaching business. She’s got an entire knowledge and experience as a therapist.

She’s a Certified Style and Confidence Coach. She’s a dating coach and a matchmaker. She’s helped thousands of people find lasting love and connection. She has helped them attract business success, build valuable relationships. She uses her unique confidence make-over process, which comes across on our show. You’ve got to pay attention to the way that she’s styling her show because she’s using it constantly on her show to serve. She uses an outside-in approach and Kim has changed lives by changing their style. Their emotional and social intelligence using her signature formula, The Charisma Quotient. She works on body language, first impressions, imaging and messaging, and how it impacts attraction. She’s a Los Angeles-based expert. She travels the country helping people discover their confidence, their charisma, and connection as a speaker. She speaks at the National Matchmaking Conferences, eharmony, Neutrogena, The Guild at Universal and iDate.

She’s also a regular contributor to Huffington Post and DigitalRomance.com, with appearances in Cosmopolitan, Oprah Magazine, Redbook, Reader’s Digest, AskMen, Fox News Magazine, Yahoo Shine, and the Washington Examiner. She’s been on tons of other podcasts. She also has some experience being a guest and she is the leading love expert on the traveling live dating show, The Great Love Debate and the cable reality dating show, The Romance. She is a Love Coach for the dating app, Datefit. Look at all this stuff that she’s been able to do. She’s been podcasting since 2017 and her show has some unique factors that we’re going to talk about. It’s what makes her bingeable but it’s also what drives her on-air way approach to content generation, approach to her listeners that drives her to turning them into direct coaching clients. I want you to take advice from Kim Seltzer of The Charisma Quotient.

Host Charisma: Hosting a podcast is more than just the authority factor. You also gain a reachability factor from all around the world.

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Kim, I’m so glad to get to talk to you again.

The last time I saw you, we were sharing sushi at Podfest.

I loved that we got to meet in person. Kim and I met at Podfest but we knew each other through a mutual acquaintance of ours Scott Carson. He raved about you and I never got to see your original webinar that had been a part of a summit and I was like, “I had to go back and do it.” I’ve gone back to watch it and I’ve listened to some of your advice. I didn’t get to catch your talk because we were back-to-back one after the other at Podfest because it’s insane there. Some of my clients listen to your talk. I hope you’ll share some of those with everybody here, too, some of your words of wisdom. I think you hit 100 episodes or so?

I think 135.

Congratulations. Doesn’t that feel good?

I feel like I birthed the baby and it keeps growing. Every time I hit a new milestone, there’s something also interesting that comes of it. It’s much like watching a child grow up.

There are always stages. I love that about podcasting too. What made you start 135 episodes?

It’s funny when I look back and I can’t even believe I’m here. Back when I first started, before that, I was going on a ton of podcasts. I usually speak in person. I’m used to getting feedback from people. I have a theater background. I used to do improv quite a bit. I love people and talking and all of that. The whole podcast industry was foreign to me. This is a cute, funny story. I used to be quite a frequent flyer on a podcast called Art of Charm. Jordan Harbinger and he’s a dear friend of mine. I was almost the Dr. Phil on Art of Charm and I would give the voice of reason, the therapist’s point of view, the woman’s point of view, as well as advice, and people kept emailing me. They’re like, “I like what you had to say. You should have your own podcast.” I would laugh and chuckle and say, “I should.” I kept going on other people’s podcasts. I shared this at Podfest and I will reveal it here. Jordan and I started a podcast on our own and it was called Full Disclosure.

Host Charisma: Every time I hit a new milestone, there’s something also interesting that comes of it.

We went to a studio and I don’t even think the studio exists anymore. We have 30 episodes, just he and I, where people would call in and we would coach them. He would do the guy version of advice and I would do the girl version. We thought it was good but then everything changed with his business. Still, at that point that I realized, this is powerful because afterward, these people who would call in would email me and say, “Kim, I liked what you had to say. I wish that you had your own podcast. I like your coaching.” What’s funny to me and a little backstory, I teach confidence, charisma, how to connect and all of that stuff but here, I didn’t feel confident enough to start on my own. We’re always our own best teachers. What happened to me is that a media company had gotten in touch with me and they say, “We want to represent you.” They were putting me out in other media stuff, but then they said, “We’re going to help you launch your podcast.”

I was so excited that somebody was going to do all the backend stuff which I wish I knew you back then. I’ve been glad to hop on board then but I needed the structure. One of the things that were hard for me, confidence-wise, is that I am not good with the tech stuff. I do not know or understand the back end of things at all. I didn’t know the structure of the podcast. I didn’t know how to wrap my head around it. I knew how to talk, give advice, knew how to be fun and funny, but I didn’t know the format. They helped put structure to it. That’s where my podcast was born. To be honest, I can’t even believe I’m here, 134 episodes later, because I kept doing what I was doing and I wasn’t getting ahead of it. I was focusing on a little bit at a time.

Your structure is one of the things that I love the most about your show. I want to talk about that a little bit. For those of you who haven’t listened to her show yet, it’s called The Charisma Quotient. I love the name. It expresses who you are and what you’re about. It’s got so much flexibility in the name. I’m pointing this out because so often I hear show names and I’m like, “That’s why your show doesn’t have a good listenership. It’s in the name right there.” Yours is the opposite of that. You’ve given yourself open flexibility with the name to have it be about the guest, not just about what you bring but it also is about what you bring as a coach. You’ve left it open-ended so that whenever they listen, they don’t think that it’s all about you. It’s all about whatever this show is about. You’re giving yourself openness to grow, you haven’t limited that, which I like as well. Those are some good reasons to give yourself this open-ended name to your show. It’s not named after your business and you itself. That’s a success factor.

When picking a name for your podcast, make sure it speaks to what you do. Click To Tweet

That’s great feedback and observation because when we were thinking about the name, it spoke to also what I do. I do so many different things and I didn’t want to be pigeonholed to being one person like, “She’s just a dating coach.” I’m a therapist, I’m an image consultant, I’ve been a matchmaker and I do this holistic approach in helping people outside and in. There were so many topics that could come out of that. Charisma seemed right because that is what I teach. There are so many little things within that.

That’s the structure show, Kim. To everyone reading, her show is structured. I’m going to say you have three different types of episodes that you run. You run episodes in which you’re giving advice, you’re sometimes taking questions that you read on-air and then you answer them. You have topic-based so it’s you and you’re talking. You have other episodes, which I liked the fact that you do this, where you start with a little bit of your advisory thing on a theme and then you go into an interview and they tie together. You’re interviewing someone who’s out there and then you have on-air coaching, which is intimidating to a lot of people. First off, they think that in your world, people would be reluctant to go on air and talk about it, which is they’re not shy at all. I’ve noticed as I listened to them but that’s where your improv background has so served you well because you don’t know what people are going to say. You have to flex, you have to make it a show in addition to doing a good job coaching.

To me, that’s the fun part. I didn’t want it to be so canned where it was Q&A and have too much prep work. I will have either the coaching clients or experts ask me beforehand, “What are we talking about?” I say, “I don’t know. I’m going to talk a little bit about this, but let’s see what happens.” I want it to feel like we’re sitting here chatting. It’s funny that you said that they’re not shy at all. At first, they’re nervous behind the scenes but they realize after they get going, it’s no different than a coaching call with me. They even forget that they’re on there.

Her structure has built-in flexibility that shows different facets of how Kim works. You’re getting to feel those different aspects of her and she’s getting to be broad in what she talks about, but it’s still narrow in its focus for the audience that’s attracted to it. She’s got that going on for her. That is truly the success factor that she has going on about it. When you were working with the media company, did they help bring that to you or did you bring that to them?

Host Charisma: I wanted to find ways to give people that hope.

It was a mix of both. They provided media training, the actual aspect of talking into the microphone, the presentation skills, and all of that. That’s the stuff that I didn’t need as much. What we focused on with that is coming up with different ideas for the episodes. The truth is that they gave me the building blocks or the foundation for it, but then I started making it my own. I figured out a rhythm and a pattern with it that ended up working.

That’s so important that you do that because once it becomes you and not something that doesn’t feel genuine to you, you’re more likely to stick with it and make it to your 135 episodes. It’s hard to do something that doesn’t feel right to you.

I knew that I would get bored listening to myself talk, so I’m like, “I’ve got to bring other people in here. I’ve got to do something to mix it up.” I know I’m not going to be motivated to pimp them out each week.

You were talking about being a speaker and doing things like that before your podcast, but did it accelerate? Did you find a greater authority after having a podcast?

It was hard to wrap my head around how far reach this was. When I speak, it’s a concentrated room with people in it or even virtual summits that I’ve done. I’ve done those a ton of times. The podcast, you having that microphone, speaking into it and then having people from Saudi Arabia and Portugal reach out and say, “Your podcast is big here.” It touches me to know that I’m helping people from all over the world. More than the authority factor, it’s the reachability factor that has been profound for me.

That was the same case for me when we first realized we were being read in Brazil and South Africa. They were getting a lot of value out of it. They were the ones reaching out and asking questions more so than people in the US. I was shocked at that. It made me also keep going. Doesn’t it give you the drive to keep going?

What’s so fascinating is it also gives you a lot of material for more episodes. The more people that I talk to from different countries, hearing the commonalities and the differences, what’s happening with the relationships, dating, and all that also gives you content for future episodes. That’s also powerful.

As a coach, you can let your podcast do the selling for you and convert listeners into clients. Click To Tweet

You’re used to being that kind of coach who’s keeping people moving, keeping them confident, breaking through fears, and all of those things. There’s a lot of fear going on in the world. What I loved about looking at through your topics and all the things in your list of episodes is that you weren’t doing this overly trendy hyped up COVID-19 episodes. You were saying to people, “You can still establish relationships even with social distancing or even with physical distancing.” You dove into like, “We’ve talked about this before and we’re going to keep talking about it.” I loved that more calm approach to it. Did you think that through or were you like, “This is who I am and I’m going to keep doing what I do?”

I didn’t think it through. To be honest, we were supposed to release a couple of different episodes with other experts before all this happened. In my gut, it didn’t feel right. I go with feeling, I’m very feeling-based and that’s what I teach. What are people talking about? What’s the flavor and the feeling of the environment? That’s what came to me. I felt like my job was to lift everyone up and to wrap my arms around everybody because of this fear. In fact, the virus is fear more than anything else. I wanted to find ways to give people that hope. I didn’t think much through it other than one day sitting down and be like, “This is what I got a pimp out.”

I love that you’re flexible about your show. You’re not restrictive about it. You’re saying, “I’m serving my audience first and foremost.” That comes through in your show clearly. Before I get to my five things, I’m going to get your advice on everything. I’m going to hit your bingeability factor. Usually, I do it after but I want to hit it now because it ties into that. These are the three things that make me want to listen to the entire catalog of shows. It’s easy for a lot of people to come in and they go, “This is a great show. I like this. I’ll listen and go forward.” It is a special show that gets you to go back to the beginning, listen to older episodes, and keep going. It has to have some special factors.

One of the things that you do so well is you don’t coach in a preachy way. You’re not like, “We’ve talked about this, this is what you do, and this is the lesson.” You talk about it and you say, “This is a recurring theme.” You’re very calm about it. It makes me have this, what I call open looping, which is a technique you use onstage and other places, which makes me go, “There’s got to be more content here. It’s back in some of these old episodes. I better go back to the beginning and listen because I want to know all about this.” You get me excited without forcing me and pushing me into those. That’s a great way that you do it. You will tie an interview you did. You’ll tie a little mention to something you talked about in a prior week, but you do it in this nice casual dropping way as if assuming that they’re along in the conversation with you all the time anyway.

Host Charisma: Going on other people’s podcasts is probably the best way for growth. Always look for new ideas.

It makes that intimacy between you and the audience your true bingeability factor that you’re like, “We’re here together. There’s stuff here and if you’re interested, it’s there.” You’re dropping it like that without being promotional. That expresses itself. The second part of your bingeability factor is that you are personally interested in every person you talk to, whether it’s your coaching clients. You have your expert guests, your attention and interest level make me want to find out more about the person, a deeper level. It brings me right into the realm of the conversation. I feel like I’m sitting in the room with you. That’s truly special.

Thank you for that feedback. That feels so good to be reflected that.

I’m so glad because this is the thing. When we listen to that, that’s what my show is all about is making sure that people understand that there are some of these factors, they’re never going to be for you. It’s not right for you. When you’ve got someone who’s a wonderful coach on such a difficult subject like dating and relationships, that’s an intimate subject. Who’s built a show that has that intimacy level? It’s a draw. I guarantee you, you get a lot of clients.

I do and we can talk about this later, but that’s how I’ve been building my business lately. It’s all been coming from my podcast in an organic way. That’s why I love the fact that this is called The Binge Factor. Somebody started the call with me because I do these breakthrough calls at the end. That’s how I hop on the phone with them and we talk about their dating life and that turns into a coaching client. There was this long pause at the peak of our conversation. I’m like, “Hello?” She said, “I’m sorry. I can’t believe I’m talking to you. I’m having a little bit of a girl crush.” I’m like, “Oh my God.” She’s like, “No, you don’t understand. I am bingeing your episodes like Netflix.” When I heard that, it shook me. I was like, “Really? Thank you. You have to understand, it’s strange for me to be talking in a microphone by myself, not knowing anybody who’s out there. The fact that I’m talking to you means so much.”

That’s interesting you say that because I saw on the news, a pastor right here in Orange County, Saddleback, he put pictures of his parishioners on the back of the chairs in front of him, even though he’s live streaming so that he could visualize them sitting in front of him so he could remember who his audience was. You can get very impersonal quickly behind a microphone, behind a camera when you’re all by yourself and you forget that there are audience members. When you can put a name or a face to them, all of a sudden, it changes the dynamic of how you speak and you discover that because you do it in person and it feels that way. He was doing it by putting the image so that he would be looking at them and would go, “I’m speaking to the Smith family or I’m speaking to this family because I know what they’re going through.”

When you're able to speak, you're more visible, and you're able to meet other people. That, in itself, is valuable. Click To Tweet

It was helping him be in the moment. I thought, “There are other ways to do this in a virtual world.” I do these five things where I ask everybody the best ways to, and I’m going to preface the first one. The best way to get great guests. I’m going to ask you to answer it a little bit differently because I’m sure you have very similar answers to how you get your expert guests. How you get your on-air coaching to come on air. People would want to know, how do I get someone to want to be hot seated?

I do it in various ways. I’ve tried different things over the years. The first way is that I will get current clients to come on. People who already know, like, and trust me and they want an extra coaching session. That’s an easy thing. Anybody who has a current client-base to draw upon those people, even if you haven’t talked to them in a while, checking in with them and saying, “How are you? I’d love to have you come on and talk about how you’re doing.” The other thing is I’ve used my breakthrough calls to get people to come on. If I can’t convert them into a client, I’ll say, “What do you think about coming onto my show? I’ll give you a free coaching call.”

It’s free on-air so they get a benefit.

They are benefiting and a couple of times, that’s another way of converting them because then they’ll come on, they’ll get another call from me and then by the end, they’re like, “I need more.” They want the binge factor of the coaching. The third thing and this is something unique about what I’ve been doing is I do these episodes called Where Are They Now?. For anybody who does speaking, you’ll know this format where you have a success panel come up, you talk about what worked for them, where were they before, and where are they now. I’m happy to say, most of my clients have success after I coach with them. Each person’s success is different, but by the end, they’re so excited. I say, “I’d love for you to come on the show, share some inspirational thoughts and moments of how your life has changed.” They’re more than happy to do it.

They want to pay it forward. They’re at that level.

Those are a couple of ways. Sometimes I’ll throw out a call to action on social media like, “Anyone wants a free coaching call and come on the podcast.” Facebook groups is a better target market for that because it’s a little more intimate than throwing it to the world. For me, that’s what’s been successful in getting people on.

I’m going to ask this technical question because some people would want to know that? Do you have them sign a release?

No.

You should. I’m going to say that, add a release.

I didn’t even think about that. I haven’t up until now. Most of them are happy to be there but you’re right, I should.

You can have a simple one in your calendar booking so you can have this simple like, “I accept.” You can go back and check mine out that I made you fill out because you did say yes even though you may not even realize it. It’s super simple, but it does help, at least add that. You might want to do that. I did recommend it to someone who asked me about hot seating.

If I did that in my speaking gigs, I would have them sign a release.

The second one is how to increase listeners. Do you do something active to increase listenership?

That’s one area I totally look for people like you on because it’s been organic. I’m happy to say that it’s the steady growth that keeps happening each month. I’m not doing anything specifically on the backend to grow it. I do it more or less in programs that I’m in. It’s like a funnel that people go through once they sign up for something and then says, “Check out my podcast.” Going on other people’s podcasts is always a good way. In fact, I’ve been told the best way for growth. I’m always looking for new ideas.

That’s the most common answer. This is like, “What other ideas do you have?” It’s switching it around and asking me the question. That’s why we have the show because we’re always looking for new ideas. Sometimes I find great ones but most often, this one section is the most troublesome for everyone. They’re always looking for more and how do I get more? We’re always looking for new ways too.

Host Charisma: It is important to always think about who other players could be.

What’s interesting is sometimes you get caught up in the numbers especially if you are talking amongst podcasters. It’s that confidence thing because then people start talking and comparing numbers. The truth is, and at least if you’re in an industry like mine, the numbers isn’t what I’m focused on, it’s more about the listenership and the dedication of my audience because those are the people who want the coaching, who are bingeing, as you call the Binge Factor. It’s the dedication and the authenticity of the audience mean more to me than the numbers.

Vanity metrics versus actual conversionary metrics. Producing in a professional way. You’ve got help in the beginning, but what do you do ongoing to keep your professional production level up?

I’ve been so lucky. The media company that I worked with, I’m not doing much with them any longer, but the woman who ended up producing the show, in the beginning, decided to keep with me as almost like a pet project. She’s been a doll so she’s been my producer. They keep editing it and uploading it to Libsyn and getting it out there. It’s been amazing for me especially because that was the part that was hard.

If you had lost that, you’d be like, “Ahh.” You have to worry and they’ll attack again instead of in the content and your listenership.

I realized that that might not always be there. It is important to always think about who other players could be. Always looking for other people that can help with stuff like that. People might not always be there and you always have to have a plan B.

You’re pointing out a big risk to an independent, someone who’s small and who’s doing it. We have had a lot of people call us to take over production because they’re independent, have their kids at home now and they can’t do the load. They can’t handle a load, the speed, or some of those things. Keep that in mind that you should always keep your ears open for a backup plan even if you’re happy with it. You don’t know what’s going to happen and you don’t want a disruption to something that’s been doing so well for you.

Now that I know you, Tracy, you might make me call you.

Your show is doing great the way it is. Don’t mess with a good thing unless you need to. We started to talk a little bit about this part but encouraging engagement. Do you try to spur that engagement? You’re talking a little bit about Facebook groups and other things, but how do you get them to talk to you?

This is a ninja thing that I taught at Podfest.

I was hoping we were going to get to this part.

I’ll share some secrets. One is that when I have a topic, I’m very strategic about it. It’s a topic that I hear on the breakthrough calls that people are struggling with. It’s much like copywriting where you’re looking for the pain points, so to speak, and then talking about it. I always think about a topic and whether that’s with an expert, with one of the coaching clients that goes on with me or a solo, I’m intentional in that. At the end, I’m always making sure that my call to action speaks to that topic.

It’s not general, you’re trying to focus on the intention of what you want to discuss.

One of my episodes was the Top Five Fears that Prevents You from Finding Love.

That sounds like a great article title. You’re already thinking that ahead of time.

The Charisma Quotient

I should be taking all of these and making blogs and that’s the next thing I need to do because I used to blog quite a bit. Now, I’m putting all my energy into the podcast. One of the fears that I talked about is fear of abandonment and then I’ll put it to my call to action at the end, “If you’re having any fears around having the abandonment issues or whatever the thing that I’m talking about, then click this and you can sign up for a free call with me.” I try to tie in what I’m talking about. The other thing is always being mindful of the experts that I bring on. I’m also strategic. I try not to put people on who will do exactly what I do. I like it to be more complimentary. You pointed this out, I like to start with a little I call sermon or speech in the beginning. I set the tone so that I’m the authority talking. Whatever they’re adding, it’s adding value to what I already am the authority of.

Do you record that after you interview them or before?

Right when they’re on with me.

They’re on so they hear it. You’re setting the tone. That is an interesting model. A lot of times I do the interview and then I’ll go back and do my beginning so they didn’t know it. That’s what we’ve done here for all of those out here. You’re getting a little meta about how we’re creating our show. I jumped right in with Kim so she didn’t know me introduce her. Part of the reason I do that is because sometimes things come up in our conversation where I didn’t know about them and it would have made a difference as to why you want to read the episodes. That’s why I choose to do it that way but I like your method because you’re setting the tone for how the conversation’s going to go. In a sense, I’m already prepping them for the call without having to do it ahead of time.

I equate it to almost steering the boat a little because it can get rocky if no one’s in charge especially when you have other experts coming in. I find that when it’s free for all if you have a strong expert, they’ll take over and then it’s not even a subject, that’s your audience. I’ll bring business people, talk, and I can relate anything to relationships and love. What’s funny is money and love, it’s all the same. Business skills and dates are also synonymous. The thing that I like to do is always tie in what we’re talking about to dating and relationships. If I leave it like loosey-goosey and see what happens, I find that they’ll go off on a tangent with what they already know. I like to bring it back and say, “This is how we’re tying everything in.” They get that when they hear my speech in the beginning.

On and aside from encouraging engagement though, she’s controlling the show which I love. Let’s go to money and love because the last question that I have is the best way you found to monetize your show and I suspect it’s in your client base.

It’s 100% of my client base. What my subject at Podfest is how to build a coaching business through podcasting. Full disclosure, I don’t have sponsorships. I don’t do affiliate marketing either although I’m looking to do that. I’m so open to all of that. I just know what I know so that’s where I started.

It would be a shame for you to have sponsors in your show because you spent so much time building this authority. That doesn’t mean that occasionally, an affiliate model, something where you know is of high value like, “I don’t have a problem if I found a useful social media program that was going to get you readers.” I would add that to my show as an affiliate. Honestly, I don’t care about affiliate so I would tell you about it and send you there. I wouldn’t care about the money back, but if it adds value to the listenership, they’re going to get something high value at it, and it’s going to create a success factor or something I don’t do because you’ve established such high value and authority in yourself, you’d be giving that away and deep valuing it by sponsorship.

You always have to look at everything as an opportunity. Click To Tweet

It’s so interesting you said that. I thought about that and I wondered but so many people are preaching sponsorship. It is a great way for you to get a passive income but you’re right. More in the coaching realm having that affiliate partner that falls into the same theme but don’t compete with you is a better way to go.

At the end of the day, it builds that trust factor with your audience. You’re not selling them stuff. You haven’t changed that, the trust factor is all-in. You’re genuine, you’re giving and if you want to work with me, you can. There are ways. It leaves it at that level. That’s why your monetization is way up in terms of converting into clients because you’re not giving away all of that all the time and you’re not devaluing with that sponsor model. I think that sometimes we look at the numbers wrong, you were talking about vanity metrics and numbers before. If we look at our numbers wrong and we say, “It’s costing me $500 a month to produce my show, I need to recoup the $500.” You’re not looking at the fact that I get a client who generates $2,000 for me every single month, at least one out of my show, I am recouping my costs. We’re not looking at it from that perspective. We treat it as not a linear thing. We treated this as a random thing.

Another thing that’s been interesting also is that talking about monetization. It’s helped me convert people who were on the fence with coaching and has helped me prevent refunds from the podcast alone.

It’s like added value is what you’re saying?

Yes. There was a guy who was on the fence to do coaching with me. I said, “Think about it.” I knew and I think about it, the thing is never a good idea. I’m not saying but in this case, I knew I had to let him do that based on who he was. I said, “In the meantime, I want you to listen to these episodes of my podcast if you haven’t.” I gave him target specific episodes that had to do with his pain points. He emailed me three days later and said, “I listened to your podcast. I’m in.” It was doing the selling for me almost. In terms of the refund thing, sometimes people get cold feet after they purchase a large amount with you. I will give them homework to listen to the podcast episodes so that they feel I’m still there with them so that they don’t get scared.

This is a thing that a lot of podcasters don’t do. They don’t participate in the podcast community. You did, you’re at Podfest and you’re giving a talk at Podfest but you don’t sell podcasting services. From doing that, what have you gained and how has it helped you?

I’m going to Podfest, I’m talking, and I’m not this business podcaster. It had to do with my confidence, visibility, getting people to know my show, and the community. I love community, it’s so important, and we can all help each other. The connections that I made there was tremendous. When you’re able to speak, you’re more visible so you’re able to meet other cool people. That, for me, was what was valuable.

It puts also you being on other podcasts, less transactional and more relationship building for all of you. There’s also a case for that. You’ve set up your show, it was a while ago, and you used a partner to help you set it up. You don’t know what’s going on and how things are working. If I’m doing something right, I could be doing more or something different.

I met you. It was great and I learned so much from you.

Host Charisma: The worst thing you could do as a host is to put a bunch of information out there that’s not congruent with who you are, what you teach, or who your clients are.

I listed notes in my phone if there are little tidbits and things, I’m like, “That’s a cool thing. Maybe I should check that out and try that for my clients and then tell them all about it.” I was like, “That’s a great hack idea.” Even I who do this all the time with 350 clients, it’s like, “I get ideas.” It is important to be open-minded about that. Sometimes, we get into our mindset and it’s going to get harder again. Is this event worth it for me? Am I going to get clients out of it? Sometimes we have to go and learn too.

There are different kinds of values. That’s the biggest mistake people make and we see this in dating too. You get too target specific on one person, one thing, or one goal. You always have to look at everything as an opportunity and what you can learn and get those golden nuggets as you were describing from different things. It could be that one little note that changed your whole tactic and the way that you’re approaching podcasting. That openness is key.

If someone has a coaching business and they’re thinking about starting a podcast, they’re brand new to this, they haven’t started yet, what’s your advice for them?

First, pull in and think about what your mission is. Who is your targeted audience? Who do you like to help? What kinds of presenting problems do they have? What fears go on figuring out the pain points and then also thinking about stories that they can relate to. When it comes to coaching in particular and with podcasting in general, understanding what other people are going through so they have a feeling that you understand it, you get it. You’ve worked with clients who are also in the same boat. They’re going to want to hire you. They’re going to want to listen to you.

The worst thing you could do is to put out a bunch of information that’s not congruent with who you are, what you teach, or who your clients are. The storytelling aspect is key. You and I were talking too like, “If there’s a story, let’s talk about it.” That’s what becomes relatable. It’s not talking into somebody’s ear. How can you have a conversation? Most coaches are good at that. They’re good listeners but sometimes they’re not as good as talkers. It’s like, “This is not a lecture.” It’s more about listening, chatting, telling stories, and making it also a little entertaining. That’s the other thing. That dry stuff especially in the coaching world, it can get boring.

Your improv has served you well. That’s for sure. Kim, I’m so glad to have you on the show. Seltzer Style, I love that forwarding URL by the way, because it’s way less complicated than your normal URL. That is an awesome URL that you’ve got there. The Charisma Quotient, I love your name to your show. All of you aspiring coaches, all of you existing coaches, podcasters, check out Kim’s show. It airs every week. She’s got great styling going on in the way she’s developed her show. She’s got great binge factor. You definitely have to check it out, refer it to other people, and invite Kim to be on your show if she’s the right fit for you. Don’t forget, podcasts swapping is one of the great ways for you all to increase your listenerships together. Kim Seltzer, thank you so much for being on the show. I really appreciate it.

Thank you so much for having me. It was an honor and truly so much fun talking to you.

I’ll be back next time with another Binge Factor. Let me know if you have some great podcasters you love. If you’re a podcaster who’s got 25 episodes or more, you like to be on my show, we’ll talk about your success factor, and get a little psychoanalysis onto your binge factors. Thanks so much for reading.

Don’t miss Tracy Hazzard’s Authority Magazine article about Kim Seltzer too!

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About Kim Seltzer

With a vat of knowledge and experience as a therapist, certified style & confidence coach, dating coach, and matchmaker, Kim Seltzer has helped thousands of people find lasting love and connection, attract success and build valuable relationships using her unique “confidence makeover” process. Using an outside-in approach, Kim has changed lives by changing their style, emotional and social intelligence using her signature formula, “The Charisma Quotient,” working on body language, first impressions, image and messaging and how it impacts attraction. This Los Angeles-based expert travels the country helping people discover confidence, charisma and connection as a speaker at National Matchmaking Conferences, eHarmony, Neutrogena, The Guild at Universal and iDate. Kim is also a regular contributor to the Huffington Post and DigitalRomance.com, with appearances in Cosmopolitan, Oprah Magazine, Redbook, Reader’s Digest, AskMen, Fox News Magazine, Yahoo Shine and the Washington Examiner, among a myriad of other publications. You can also find Kim as the leading love expert on the traveling live dating show The Great Love Debate and the cable reality dating show, The Romance. She is the Love Coach for the dating app Datefit. You can also listen to her now on her podcast, The Charisma Quotient. And she currently is hosting The Flirt Academy workshops nationwide.